Toasters, Blenders, and Lemon Zesters

It is no secret that I like to read books. Correction: that I love to read books. What does seem to be a secret, though I can't for the life of me figure out why, is that Gretchen also loves to read books. Contrary to popular belief, the 1,900-some books we have in our living room are not all mine. In fact, not a few came from Gretch's collection.

Now, to be fair, I did have a lot more books than her. And I do talk about reading more than she does. And, yes, I do tend to refer to our book collection as my book collection. That's just an odd quirk of mine. After all, I refer to the intermediate hallway in Wiley Elementary School as "my" hallway" in "my" building. I think I started claiming things as my own as a mental reminder to treat them with the utmost care. Pretty certain it goes back to the days of operating the spotlights in high school and running the sound equipment for the jazz ensembles.

Anyway, back to books. Gretch and I both love reading, and one of the genres that we both love equally are dystopian novels. And, to risk sounding like a hipster (okay, I admit it, I am a hipster), we loved dystopian novels before they were cool. One of the first books that Gretch recommended I read was Gathering Blue followed by Messenger. Before she told me, I didn't even know there was a sequel to The Giver, let alone that it was a series! I, on the other hand, have been advocating for her to read the Obernewtyn Chronicles, a series I was first introduced to while in Australia. She hasn't read it yet, but she will soon.

As the end of the school year approached, my principal informed me that I had a substantial amount of money remaining in my classroom budget, and that I needed to use that money for classroom supplies. So, of course, my initial reaction was to go out and buy books. I brought Gretch along because I knew she'd be better able to help me pick out books for my students than I would. You see, I somehow missed out on most of the YA literature when I was a kid. By the time I was in middle school, I was reading books by John Grisham and Richard Bach. In high school, I was reading massive tomes like Atlas Shrugged and works by Heinlein. I also turned to friends on the Internet for suggestions. One of my favourite blogs is EPBOT, which is devoted to "Geekery, Girliness, and Goofing Off." A recent post made by Jen, the creator of EPBOT, was dedicated to YA literature for those who had just finished reading The Hunger Games.

Thus, armed with a purchasing card, my wife, and Jen's blog post, Gretch and I headed to Barnes & Noble for some major geeking out. Note to those who may have been at Barnes & Noble at the same time I was there with a purchasing card: I am sorry if my squeals, giggles, and running through the aisles towards books disturbed your peaceful browsing.

After shopping, I had two bags stuffed full of books. Some of the selections for my classroom included The Hunger Games, and the Uglies series. I also discovered that I already had some dystopian novels in my classroom, such as Matched. As soon as we got home, Gretch began reading Uglies while I finished reading the Shadow Children series. There will be much reading of books in the Valencic household this summer! I am sure that the Hunger Games and Obernewtyn Chronicles will make their way through the reading lists, as well as Matched, Divergent, and Birthmarked. Depending on how much time we have, we will see what else we get through this summer! There is a great Wikipedia article on all of the dystopian literature written since the late 1800s, so there are definitely plenty of books to read!

Champaign is an interesting city. Three hours to the north, we have Chicago, Illinois. Three hours to the east is Indianapolis, Indiana. Three hours to the south is Louisville, Kentucky. And three hours to the west is St. Louis, Missouri. We have friends in Chicago, so we've been there from time to time since we got married. We've never gone to the east or the south as a couple. But we have two things in St. Louis that bring us to the west several times a year: one of our church's temples, which we are encouraged to visit frequently in order to worship and contemplate, and one of my older brothers, who lives there with his wife and children.

We are always meaning to visit St. Louis more often than we do. It is hard to get away, and it is hard to spend the money for gas. So we are also always looking for a good reason to make sure our birds have plenty of food and water and hit the open road.

Earlier this week, I got a call from my brother wanting to know what we were doing this weekend. Neither Gretch nor I had anything pressing in the calendar, and so he asked if we'd be interested in coming down for a visit. He and his wife had a graduation party they had been invited to, but they needed a babysitter for Saturday night. Now, yeah, they could have asked some of their usual babysitters from church to do it, but it was going to be one of those late-night affairs and they don't like to keep teenagers out that late. And besides, my brother's kids love us. So he asked if we'd be interested in coming down for a visit. We gladly accepted the offer. Like I said, we're always looking for a good reason to visit!

We left after work on Friday and got there in time for dinner and then my brother and I went to play geeky card games with some of his buddies while Gretch stayed with our sister-in-law and the kids. I was introduced to two card games: Galactic Encounters and Citadels. I would have jointly won the first game with my brother if I'd remembered a card I had in my hand before he beat me, but I won the second by working my magic as a merchant. (At least, I think I did--it was late and we were tired.) I texted Gretch and told her that we needed to get more of these geeky card games, since Killer Bunnies and the Quest for the Magic Carrot is the only one currently in our collection.

We spent Saturday hanging out with the family, just chilling and talking. My brother and I went to a local costume store because we'd heard rumours of a steampunk section and I wanted to check it out. It was decent, but not quite what I had hoped for. Then Gretch and I spent all of Saturday evening with the kids while their parents went to their friends' graduation party. We watched Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace while eating rice crispy treats. This did not have quite the same effect as the time I babysat another brother's children by watching X-Men and eating caramel popcorn, but it seems to be the thing I do. (No wonder I am the favourite uncle--I give them sugar and let them watch awesome movies!)

After church on Sunday, we spent the afternoon napping and playing games on my phone with my nephew. I tried to teach him how to play Yahtzee. He got the idea of the upper section down (getting as many ones, twos, threes, fours, fives, or sixes as possible), but he didn't quite get the idea of the lower section (especially the full house, small straight, and the large straight). However, since he is not-quite-four-years-old, I think I've made good progress. I also entertained my niece by wearing her froggy blankie on my head while trying to get her to walk; she still prefers crawling, though.

On the drive home, we ran into some seriously nasty weather. Huge bolts of lightning, insanely strong winds, and rains so heavy we could barely see in front of the car. Fortunately, the storm passed quickly and we made it home in good time. To cap off an excellent weekend, my new Doctor Who shirt from woot.com was waiting for me in the mailbox! I'd say it would be quite hard to find a better way to spend one's time.

I finally got around to updating our blog last week and, as those who read it hopefully figured out, it was quite the marathon writing session! It took me over an hour and a half to write the 2,900-plus post!

I told Gretchen that I wanted to start updating our blog at least once a week on Sunday mornings. We have church in the afternoon this year, so it means we have a lot of time in the morning to prepare and plan and spend time together. (Somehow this doesn't seem to work when we have church in the morning or in the middle of the other two congregations with which we share our building.)

The funny thing is that I am not at all opposed to blogging. As many of you probably (hopefully) know, I blog every day about my adventures in teaching fourth grade. (If you didn't know, the blog is at http://teachingfourth.wordpress.com. It is updated every day I have work, and occasionally on weekends or holidays if I have something to write about.) But for some reason, Gretch and I just got out of the habit of updating here. So here we go: I am finally getting back into the habit of updating regularly.

Today is Mothers' Day in the United States of America (and probably other countries). Some people, including the woman who came up with the holiday, think the name of the holiday should be written as Mother's Day to give special attention to your own mother, but I prefer to think of it as a plural possessive holiday--a day for all mothers all over the world. After all, we may only have one biological mother, but many of us have several mother-figures in our lives.

My own mother is a wonderful woman who encouraged each of her eight children to pursue their dreams and do their very best. She also knew when to push and when to let us go out on our own. One of my older brothers sent her a card about wanting to run away, but thanking her for never doing it. (And believe me, with six boys, I am sure she felt like running for the hills many times!) Then he included a note that said, "And thanks for giving me a suitcase each time I said I wanted to run away." (Or something like that.) My mum was and still is like that. She knows just how to respond and how to use laughter in any situation.

I have had many fantastic conversations with the woman who carried me in her womb, then in her arms, and then allowed me to walk on my own. Just this past weekend we spent a couple of hours sitting on the couch, talking about education, jobs, the economy, family stories (which I famously mess up and embellish in an effort to get my parents and siblings to record the stories accurately), and television shows. My mum is the best possible mum in the world for me!

I also have other mums, though. My mother-in-law, who let me marry her daughter, eat her food, and even live in her house for several weeks after Gretch and I found ourselves homeless a couple of summers ago. Mama Shep, from church, who adopted a bunch of us young single adults in the area and made sure we were fed properly and had a place to watch excellent movies, like Tangled. She also helped me find fabric for the Snoopy pillow cases I wanted to make for Gretch and then made them, too. Jennifer, who took me in when I went to Australia for a semester and showed up at church and said, "Hi, my name is Alex. I am from the States, I'm here for a semester, and I need a place to live. Anyone know of anyone with a place?" And, of course, I can't forget about Laurie's mom, Chuck's mom, Kramer's mom, Adam's mom, Noah's mom, Tasha's mom, Colleen's mom, Carl's mom, and all of the other mothers who have been there for me and helped me stay on the right path.

So today I don't honour just my biological mother; I honour all of the women who have been mothers for me throughout the years! Happy Mothers' Day!

This is the blog post that I have wanted to write for several months. Since the end of August, in fact. I have delayed and hesitated and drafted then discarded and doubted and planned and drafted and discarded so many times that I find myself wondering why I didn't just get it done with.


The quick answer to that last bit is that I was hoping for the last piece of the puzzle to show up and fit in the right place so I could put it together. But recent events have made me realise that I shouldn't have doubted and struggled with this post; that I should have just written it.


First some background. This is mostly going to be information that close family and friends already know but I want to share it for the benefit of those who may be visiting this blog for the first time, or just stumbled upon it while searching for information.


Gretch and I got married in 2008. This was right after I had graduated, but about a year before she did. For the first year of our marriage, we did not try to conceive a child because we wanted to make sure Gretch was able to finish school. We were also hoping that it would give us time to become financially prepared to have a child. So this story, and the purpose of this post, really starts in 2010.


After several months of trying, Gretch got pregnant. We were ecstatic and nervous and happy and worried and all of those things that I imagine new expecting couples experience. For Christmas the previous year, her siblings gave her a copy of What to Expect When You're Expecting as a gag gift. But we were grateful to have it and we read it regularly. We told our family and close friends, and we scheduled our first appointment with a doctor at our clinic. (Our primary care physician, Dawn McCoy, doesn't do obstetrics, but we wanted to stay at the clinic, so we were recommended to another doctor in the family medicine department, Jane Kim, whose specialty is adult medicine, women's medicine, and obstetrics.) The appointment was scheduled to take place at approximately the 8-week mark of the pregnancy.


Two years ago, almost to the day (a week before Mothers' Day), we experienced our first tragedy as a young couple: Gretch miscarried. She had been spotting for a few days but, feeling that was normal, we didn't do much about it. Then the spotting got worse and she told her mom, who said that that didn't sound normal and we should see a doctor. Then the pain started. To call it crippling would be fairly accurate. We called the doctor and they directed us to go to the Emergency Room. We got there and waited and waited and waited. Then they brought Gretch in and did an emergency ultrasound. What should have been a wonderful experience for us became the exact opposite. They informed us that she was "threatening miscarriage" and gave us some fairly detailed instructions on what to do. This was approximately five weeks into the pregnancy, as best as we could tell.


The miscarriage (or what we learned is called in the medical community a "spontaneous abortion") took place, and there was grief and tears and sorrow. And anger. How could God, or nature, or whatever take a woman's first child a week before Mothers' Day of all days? We got through the pain and the sorrow and, after talking on the phone with our not-yet-seen-OB's nurse, decided to go in for the appointment we'd had scheduled to discuss what had happened and what we should do next. Dr. Kim confirmed to us what we had heard from many other people: doctors estimate that nearly one in every four pregnancies end in miscarriages, and many women who miscarry go on to have no complications with future pregnancies. She advised us to wait for three months before attempting to conceive in order to give Gretch's body time to heal and fully recover from the experience.


Around this same time, we turned to the Internet and to What to Expect to learn more about miscarriages. This is a character trait that Gretch and I share; whenever we experience something new, whether good or bad, we turn to what has been written before to get as much information as we can to better understand what is going on.


We waited and then after three months, we began trying to conceive again. We were elated Gretch quickly got pregnant and, knowing that the doctor would not want to see her until the 8-week mark, we waited until six weeks had passed. This was also just passed the point of her first miscarriage, and so we made the call and set up the appointment. Oddly enough, we ended up telling a few friends at a summer camp we were working at about the pregnancy because Gretch had been slightly cramping and we had to explain to those running the camp why she was not able to do all of the tasks she had volunteered to do.


A week later, tragedy struck again. Gretch started spotting and then bleeding heavily, and the cramps came on. We both knew what was happening but hoped and prayed it would stop. It didn't. We didn't even have to visit the doctor this time. We knew what had happened, and we knew that there was nothing we or the doctors could do to prevent. A miscarriage in the first trimester is just too early to stop. There was not anger this time, just grief and disappointment. I remember being terrified that it was my fault. You see, Gretch and I had been running a custodial cleaning company at the time and occasionally went in to work with our employees or to clean some offices so the employees wouldn't have to be out so late. Just a few days before the miscarriage started, Gretch had helped me clean an office and had done a lot of vacuuming. I was filled with anger at myself for asking her to do that for me; what if the stress on her body had been too much?


Once again, we went in to visit our doctor after the loss. Once again, we talked about health and healing. Our wonderful doctor comforted us and counseled us. She felt that Gretch's body just wasn't ready yet, that it had been too soon. Dr. Kim wanted us to wait for a full six months before attempting to conceive again. At this point, she still felt that there was a strong likelihood that Gretch could carry a baby to full term. We called our parents and told them what had happened and what the doctor had counseled. They lovingly encouraged us and supported us in our struggles. Our best friends were also told and they, too, comforted us in a way that made us truly grateful for our loved ones.


Over the next six months, we waited and counted the days until we could try to conceive again. We also experienced some major changes in our lives. Gretch had started a new job, we had closed our business and I was anxiously searching for full-time teaching positions. We were planning on having a child in our home within the next 18 months, and we wanted to be ready. July and August 2011 were roller coaster weeks for us. I had a flurry of job interviews all around Illinois, I got hired at my current job two weeks before school started, and Gretch had her third confirmed pregnancy. We waited and after a full six weeks passed, we called the doctor's office, again. We scheduled an appointment and went in to see her.


We were thrilled! For the first time, we were seeing our doctor when Gretch was pregnant. We talked, we planned, and we received vast quantities of literature about our clinic's obstretrics and neo-natal departments. We were thrilled. The doctor gave Gretch a physical and when she attempted to hear the baby's heartbeat, we knew there was something wrong. She decided to do an ultrasound and was worried when there was no visible heartbeat. But she also thought that maybe Gretch was just not as far along as we'd thought. We scheduled a nurse consult for the following week, which happened to be the first day of school for my students. Gretch went on her own so that I could be there with my class.


I wish I had arranged with my principal to be gone that afternoon so that I could have gone with her. What Gretch learned was devastating. There was no heartbeat and the nurse who saw her told her that she would most likely experience a miscarriage because the fetus was not growing. What we learned several weeks later was that the nurse did not express herself well, or Gretch did not hear her correctly. We kept our hopes up that we would somehow experience a miracle and that the baby would start growing. Doctors make mistakes, and it would certainly not have been the first time that someone was told that they were miscarrying only to go on and have a healthy baby born at full-term.


Alas, it was not to be. Gretch miscarried for the third time in two years and our doctor immediately realised that this was not a normal problem. She helped arrange a visit with the clinic's reproductive medicine specialist, Nancy Fay, who we learned has worked with several friends of ours in the past. This doctor usually has such a busy schedule that she is not able to see a new patient for months. We got in to see her within a week. This turned out to be the turning point of a very disappointing journey.


Our new doctor spoke with us at great length and asked about our own and our family's medical backgrounds. She told us about the most common reasons for repeated miscarriages and promised that she would be with us until we figured out what was going on. I was immediately struck by her compassion and her dedication to her work and felt that we were exactly where we needed to be at that time. Then we met with her nurse, who asked many of the same questions and talked about different treatment plans. And blood work. My goodness, I never knew that there were so many tests that one person could have done on their blood! We agreed to do whatever was necessary. Blood was collected, tissue samples were collected and delivered to the clinic's laboratory, and the regular visits with the doctor and her nurses began.


Somewhere in the midst of those early visits, we first heard about Polycystic Ovary Syndrome, or PCOS. Gretch was asked if she had any family history of PCOS, and the initial response was negative. Neither one of us had heard of it before. We later learned, somehow or another, that there is a family history of this syndrome and we called the nurse and let her know. But we didn't hear anything back about that.


So many tests! So many concerns! Gretch was diagnosed with Sub-Clinical Hypothyroidism, which is a genetic disorder that, for most people, is not a problem. Not a problem, at least, unless they are trying to conceive. She was prescribed levothyroxin and began taking a very low dosage of the medicine every morning. One blood test indicated the possibility of an auto-immune disease, and so we went to the endocrinologist to have him look at her blood results. Whatever the disease was, Gretch didn't have it. But the doctor suggested that Gretch be tested for PCOS, because, to his knowledge, that seemed to be the most likely culprit. This was the first time we had heard anything further about this since that first appointment in August.


An endometrial polyp had been discovered and an outpatient surgery was scheduled so that Gretch could have a hysteroscopy to remove it from the uterine wall. This was in December. During the pre-surgery visit with Dr. Fay, I asked about PCOS, explaining that the endocrinologist had brought it up. She was looking at Gretch's patient notes and said something along the lines of, "Wait, no one has talked to you about this?" It turns out that it had been in the notes from almost the first visit but, in the midst of the shuffling of papers and blood tests and everything, it was forgotten. This made us realise that we should always ask if there are any notes we need to know about!


 Because of the polyp, Dr. Fay decided to wait until after the surgery to start Gretch on treatment for PCOS. She did give us some background information, but felt that we needed to tackle one thing at a time. The surgery was on December 30. It took several hours, but there was nothing unusual. Dr. Fay performed the surgery and spoke with me while Gretch was in recovery. Then I was able to sit with Gretch until they felt she was ready to go home. I must say, that evening was very interesting indeed. Suffice it to say that Gretch says the strangest things when she is heavily medicated.


Two weeks after the surgery, we met with Dr. Fay again. We were told that there was nothing to worry about the polyp, and she was ready to start Gretch on treatment for PCOS. She gave us more information about it but, honestly, we had done so much research on it already that we felt quite secure in our understanding of the syndrome and what all it does. Polycystic Ovary Syndrome is a genetic disorder, very, very common in women, which is principally detected by the imbalance of several hormones, especially insulin, androgens (like testosterone and androstenedione), and progesterone. Some of the side effects of PCOS are cysts on the ovaries (hence the name), excessive weight gain, hairiness (like a man), or "dirty" looking skin on joint creases like the neck or elbows. The most common treatment for PCOS is a daily dosage of metformin that varies in size. Some people take metformin all at once. Gretch initially found that spacing it to coincide with meals worked better, but has recently switched to taking it all at once in the morning.


One of the most common side effects of metformin is nausea but we were told that, for reasons not quite understood, a low-carb diet helps off-set the side effects. We were also told that the metformin would help with weight loss, so the combination of a low-carb diet, exercise, and the medication would help Gretch lose weight, which is something with which she has struggled for a very long time.


The past several months have been filled with adventures in finding new foods to eat that didn't include our previous staples of rice or noodles. We have also been trying to exercise regularly. I wake Gretch up at 7:00  each morning to take her levothyroxin and then, 30 minutes later, she eats and takes her metformin. She has experienced changes in taste and appetite, but we roll with the variations and I eat the leftovers. Gretch has also been losing weight, which has been a side blessing along our path.


After three months of metformin, we were told that the last test would be to measure Gretch's progesterone levels after ovulation. All other blood tests were coming up normal, which was fantastic news! We learned about measure basal body temperature, which has just become another routine in the morning. We tracked the temperatures, looked for the spike, and called to schedule the latest in a long line of blood tests.


Last week we had our appointment and the results were mixed. We met with Dr. Fay's nurse who told us that the blood work was anovulatory. This meant one of two things: either Gretch did not ovulate, in which case there are other steps to be taken, or her progesterone is not being produced in ample quantities to support ovulation, in which case other steps can be taken. We are still working closely with our doctors to monitor Gretch's health, hormone levels, thyroid levels, and basal body temperature so that we can continue to move toward a successful full-term pregnancy.


So, are we going to keep everyone posted on our attempts to conceive? No, no we will not. We probably won't even tell anyone about a pregnancy until we are into the second trimester. (No, Gretch is not pregnant now, either.)


One last thing in this very long post. There is a reason I felt that I really just needed to get out and write this down. I mentioned earlier that PCOS is very common among women. Gretch and I have learned that many of our friends and family have experiences with this, but many people are reluctant to talk about it. After all, reproductive health is a very personal matter. But we wanted to share our experiences with those who may be struggling to conceive. Maybe others will ask their doctors about PCOS. Or maybe they know they have it and will just be glad to know they are not alone. Gretch and I are both happy to talk to anyone who has questions about it. We can share medical resources, recipes, and ideas on what has worked for us.

For the past five years or so, I have been a strong supporter of Mitt Romney's campaign for the GOP presidential nomination. If he is nominated this election cycle, which I have no doubt he will, I will be a strong supporter of his campaign for the Presidency. But first things first, right?

Mitt's ability to create personal wealth and his business experience are supposed to be advantages to the problem solving we need to achieve a number of goals. I just don't get how these skills transfer to the policies we need to create living wage jobs for more Americans. In his experience, did he create the jobs we need? Etc.

As much as I would enjoy writing a post about The Hobbit, this is actually my annual post on my experiences at the Illinois Teen Institute just a couple of weeks ago. While many who read this blog are surely familiar with it, I am going to assume that there are at least a few visitors who may not know. So before I get into ITI 2011, let me give a brief recap:

The Illinois Teen Institute is a week-long leadership camp during the summer, sponsored by the Illinois Alcoholism and Drug Dependence Association (it has taken me many years, but I think I've finally gotten the name down pat). ITI was started in 1974 and has been going strong ever since, making it the longest-running Teen Institute in the nation.

As a Teen Institute, it is aimed at, well, teens. Students are able to attend as participants from the summer before their freshmen year of high school until the summer after they graduate. As a participant, teens are placed into two groups: First is a small discussion group of 8-12 teens and two staff members (depending on attendance numbers). The members of the discussion groups generally do not know one another before hand, and the purpose of the groups is to discuss the general sessions and workshops offered each day. The second group is a Community Action Team, and it is the heart and soul of the Illinois Teen Institute. Teens from the same area/school/community/etc work together to come up with a plan to improve their community, utilising the skills and information they have gained at the Institute. The CAT plan is conceived, planned, and carried out by teens, with adult sponsors or volunteer staff members present as resources. (As an aside, Operation Snowball, Inc. was the result of a community action plan from 1978, or thereabouts, that has become an international drug prevention program.)

As a leadership camp, ITI focuses on helping teens become better leaders in the schools, their communities, and in the state. It is also a "prevention first" program, meaning that students learn about ways to prevent risky behaviours, most notably alcohol, tobacco and other drug (ATOD) abuse, unhealthy relationships, bullying, etc. It is not a treatment, rehabilitation, or recovery program. The entire week is focused on the teens. The speakers and workshops are selected to provide meaningful information and useful skills.

I first attended ITI in 1999 as a participant. In 2000 and 2001 I was back again as a member of the Administrative Team (A-Team), which allowed me to attend free of charge as a teen staff member. As a member of the A-Team I did not have a discussion group, although I did participate with my Community Action Team. From 2002-2004 I was absent due to serving a mission in California, but I returned in 2005 as a member of the volunteer staff, working as a co-facilitator. This placed me with a discussion group and a CAT. I did this for two years before being selected as a PALS 1 Coordinator in 2007.

The PALS 1 program is designed for Peers with Advanced Leadership Skills who are coming back a second or third year to really focus on specific leadership skills. The program has changed somewhat over the years, but the main focus has always been to help those teens who are in positions of leadership be more effective leaders and to train to be leaders at ITI. (The PALS 2 program has been renamed Youth Staff and is just that: teens who have been through the program and are ready to practice what they've learned. They work with a volunteer staff member in leading discussion groups, working with action teams, and making sure the participants feel welcome and have a great week.)

I applied to be a PALS 1 Coordinator in 2008 but, due to a mix-up in contact information, I didn't learn that I had been selected until the Friday evening after staff training had started. Gretch and I had just gotten married about 3-4 weeks earlier and I was scheduled to work that entire week. Whoops. I was disappointed, but it was probably for the best, since we were still trying to get settled and all.

After bringing Gretch to my high school's Operation Snowball weekend in 2008 and 2009, I encouraged her to come to ITI, despite her complete lack of experience with the program. She applied as a volunteer staff member and was accepted as a co-facilitator. I returned as a PALS 1 Advisor (new name, same job) and we had a wonderful week together. We came back in 2010, volunteering for the same roles. During the 2010 camp, Gretch and I helped the girls in Headquarters (formerly known as the A-Team) with scheduling of workshops and other things, and I was encouraged to volunteer for HQ staff for the following year, which I did.

Which finally brings us up to ITI 2011. Due to Gretch's work schedule, she was not able to attend ITI this year. So I went alone. This marked the longest period of time we have been separated since we started dating on 16 August 2007. However, frequent telephone calls during free time and occasional chats on Google helped us make it through the week. Besides, many of our ITI friends are married and also spend the week apart. So we knew we'd be okay. Everyone asked how Gretch was doing and where she was. It was great to know that so many people care.

In fact, this is the very reason that I find myself going there and back again year after year. I love the community of caring that exists at the Illinois Teen Institute. My first CAT advisor was Brian Weidner. He had been going to school at Bradley University in Peoria back in 1999. Today he and his wife live and work in Minnesota, but he comes back each year as a workshop presenter, and we also catch up. I consider my friends at ITI to be like a family, and I hope that they think the same of me (and Gretch). Two experiences from this year really capture this sense of family.

The first was a girl who was attending as a first-year participant. She arrived with her mom, but nobody else. She was alone, and she was scared. She wanted to leave. A few of us helped her through the first few hours and encouraged her to stay, sharing our own experiences. After listening to our first speaker, the Amazing Tei Street, she decided to stick around. I later learned that she called her mom that night and said how glad she was to be there. I saw her off and on during the week, and each time she had a big smile and was laughing with her peers. She came alone; she left with a network of friends and supporters.

The other is also about a girl, here for the first time. She came from another state. She is kind of quiet and seems the kind who keeps to herself. I don't think anyone would look at her and think of her as someone who would be popular, or even someone who would hang out with the popular kids. On Tuesday evening, the teens participated in a talent show. This girl walked onto the stage and, without saying a word, put on her guitar and began to play the opening chords to Stairway to Heaven. When she finished, 300 people rose to their feet, cheering, clapping, and calling for an encore. Later on, she and one of the teen staff members, a young man who is a semi-professional musician, were jamming in a lounge area.

That, my friends, is why I keep coming back. It is because the world is not as bad as we are led to believe. There are good people doing good things. They say that the youth of today are the leaders of tomorrow. The young men and women and the Illinois Teen Institute prove that wrong. The youth of today are the leaders of today. I am blessed to work with them and I know that I am a better person because of it.